明白 自己的心情
相信 总有天一定会放声大哭
却每次装潇洒

了解他们其实在说着什么
可是偏偏装笨！装傻！
他人说话只好傻笑带过
不服！ 那又能怎样
不爽！ 那有谁了解
只好选着静来带过
后果就被他人说
"骄傲！"
哈哈...ridiculous man!

为什么明明知道那种方式会伤害到他人
可是还是偏偏继续这样对待人?
为什么明明知道自己不想笑
可是还是怕对方误会又必自己笑?
为什么说不懂这里的路
可是偏偏又能来到这里?
为什么说1了
又改变2！
为什么要欺骗
为什么要玩
我是玩的吗?
哼？
为什么?

有时很希望自己消失
要去哪就去哪
根本没想过自己对谁是重要的
全 都太假了
假得我真的受伤了

这星期都闷闷的
不懂得解释
心隐隐地疼
孤独地一个
身边的人慢慢消失
身边的人慢慢地改变
变得高级陌生
像似不曾认识过
这么想 也想不通
很难接受 可是是实事

不断地问自己
是不是自己的问题
是不是自己变了都没发现
是不是自己说话的方式

不可否认
的确有时说话语气重了点
或者开过于的玩笑
其他都没什么
还是与以前一样颠颠疯疯

朋友说不是我
而是身边的人
人很善变

太介意了吧...!?
很多事情都搞在一起
觉得一点都不开心
面对着那种带着假的微笑
又对你说好高兴能见到你
再转个面一直不断地刺你
这...是什么意思?

today

today in th end of th english period
teacher said :''those who didnt speak today must stay back!''
i mind full of ''oMG! '' this words..
6 of us sitting our own places...
facing th most fierce teacher in my 3 subject..
1 by 1 can leave th classroom after giv a reason for her..
but every reason tat had gave her sh ll said ''it is excuse!!!''
i m th 4th person to tell my reason..
sh looking at me..i felt more nervous..
''so..how about u huh?!'' ''hehe..cox i cant speak gd english''
''it is excuse!!! '' ''so how come u all can improve ur english?!''
ya..wat sh say is all exactly rite..
wat i m scaring for?
wat i m doing!?
my parents support me to study here , in class i jz b a super silent student
thn waiting for th mark decrease?!
i cant b like tat anymore..
whn parents knw tat
thy ll dissapoint..

DON SCARE!
B BRAVE!
LETS OTHER LAUGH U
WHN U SPEAK WRONG O WATEVER!

after rain

after rain it feels like everything bcome new..
i m ok today..
n right now i gona change!

complicated

my mood still th same
i m greedy
always hope to c u
but u nvr appear
i m greedy
wat i want must b mine
but i nvr try to get it as i don hv brave

complicated

i hate u!

why u nvr come again , i hate u!
why i non stop thinking imposible things
why teacher like to critic my works
why u people like to talk a lot
why u people look me with th different way
why my life FULL of sarcasm?!
...........

-w-h-y-

my life full of sarcastic... :*(

white

white

recently i discover tat i luv white

white is very simple color

simple and nice tat i alwys say that

i wanna a house v white furniture

i luv pure white car it looks cool

i luv ''tou fu fa'' right now..

whn i was small i didnt like as it is tasteless

but no choice nowadays whn i go out to hv lunch i saw th man n wife are selling th soya n tou fu fa i ll go forward n buy it

slowly i fall in it

it is tasteless but whn it + th water of sugar it bcome nice

淡淡的带着点甜

真的有点像我的生活

meaningful :)

don jugde me like tat way! wat th hell !!!!

today, after lunch i decided to go n buy ''tou fu fa'', at the time i m buying a weird gur looking at me v the very different way.. y?! Y!? damn u! i du1 rude..but th person force me to do like tat! pls! don jugde me ! i didnt do anything wrong i jz standin there n buy my favourite. is there anythin wrong har!!?? don let me c u again..i ll stare back u like th way u used to. damn u! not only u ! still hv many! wats wrong ppl outside huh!? nvr c a gur b4 izit?! u urself aso gur la!! lebih lah! bodoh! idiot! moron! hate hate hate! my sis say sh was staring back her whn sh saw sh looking me lik tat...i m glad i hv tis sis :) mayb i m too thin..BUT I ASO DU1 THIN! I LUV TO FAT! I EAT A LOT AD! DUN TRY TO C ME TO ANOTHER WAY! although i always tell myself don think wat ppl think bout me sumtimes i cant stand for this life! ! !thin is no any wrong ok?!!! OK?! dun jugde me like tat.. let me c u once... i ll did th way u did it to me! damn b*tcH!!!!! people is weird! oh god...! pls help me...

i m rude as th person didnt knw to respect me..People! respect to another 1 1st b4 u wan ppl to respect u! my mom always teach me tat.. ur parents nvr teach u 1 izit?! damn u stupid gal!

don dream...

while i m hving my class, suddenly my brian came out th gur n th little guy (Leon) whom take part in th activity tat i always go..hm..i was dreamin again..i knw illusion nvr changed into real..but i luv to dream..finally i knw wat is his name..but i long time nvr c him..i hope to c his cute face..act like a big boy..and the way he act cool~ but now..no ad.. :( .. i m so envy of th gur,sh same age v me, but everythin sh did so perfectly....wow~

today..dunno i m lucky or wat..i really work very hard for my english isu, i always tot hardworkin is stupid, but i jz realized not, it's work..i get th mark i wan...i m not very happy , it's weird. i knw. smth left in my heart. i m tired. i miss home. miss family. i hope to c him. i hope everythin ll b wonderful like last month... :(

illusion nvr change into smth real~
leelee don dream again! wake up!

he..

he didnt came again for today...
:[
y m i feel so sad?

gentle guy

i m sad today...i didnt knw y...but it started from when i bored..try to find sum entertainment for myself..went to th 3rd room..''mia..u wanna go pyramid?'' ''ok'' she ans..thn we went to there..hm....walked there for 2 hours..came back v nothin but both of us aso wanna buy a things for ouself but v got th same reason..it is too expensive..no choice..no money no need buy...wat to do? hm... ppl must study hard to earn money rite?th money earn to live rite? after tat n die rite? human life is like tat...y cant b more wonderful? i found tat i m lost in darkness..i m always askin myself whn i m doin smth '' wat i m doin for?''....useless lee lee really useless...!

nite ..old fren ask me wanna go to hv a drink? i hesitate for a while..thn said ok....so many guy's frens tat i knw he is th one very gentlemen...others..i didnt find any polite or even gentle..thy r all selfish. but..if th guy treat u very gd is bcux he like u...he totally not th same..he treat anyone aso like tat..i found tat he really gentle from tis early year...i really remember tat..a few of us went to drink thn i order th old drink ,1 of thm wanna my ice , so i let th person to take n i aso du1 drink ad as it is too sweet...th person take sum ice into his glass ad thn jz put my drink bside him..he nvr ask me whther still wanna drink a not...but i m ok..i nvr care..n jz listening wat r thy talkin...but th gentle guy stand up n take my drink from th guy n put in front of me..n tell me..''hehe...ur drink..'' i m feel very sweet at th moment.. n i m very proud i hv tis kind of fren.. n tonite he made me feel ok again.. n anyway i talked a lot a lot a lot..n he jz ''em em em'' haha i noe i really make him fan...but i feel comfortable after i talked all of wat i wanna talk...thnks gentle guy! :D

a bad week

today s sis n valerie's brithday....feel guilty cox i bought th cake tat had spoiled n th ppl in th shop jz refund for us..didnt replace any cake..a bit angry th boss there! wat th @#!$@#$ way to treat her customers like tat!? can i shout?! can i shout loudly? this week is not fine at all..not fine!~ lecturer mark my attented list for 0 mark..but i went tat day! th reason sh gave me very damn stupid! teacher! u r damn idiot! i m too straight but u make me do tis...~housemate who ate tat cake had got stomachache whn i heard tat i very sad n nearly wanna cry...~i went to th activity on monday th person who i wanna c nvr came.. ~ homework bcome more n more n more ...~test coming very very very very soon it is tomolo... i wanna collapse...y?!!!!


but anyway..valerie n sis like their present..so..can say replace for th cake..hahaha

hate! angry! irritated chemistry lecturer!

bad day

hardly to wait until today. i had too excited for everything esp for wating until 4.30pm. but in th early morning it ad happened some unhappy things.n i still make me happy n wait until 4.30pm everything ll goin fine n good. finally 4.30pm came..excited..went into th classroom i didnt saw the small guy but jz only th teacher (william)..hm? weird(i think...izit he not coming?) ''vien..he s not coming today'' hm? impossible..he must not coming today..i think again..very upset..everything was not goin smoothy..down down down..summore little guy not comin..still decided wanna ask him how old wat name...

for me..everything cant me expected to too happy..if not th day ll not goin smoothly... :(